Saturday, August 30, 2008

Feelings Right Below the Surface

This morning at 8am (midnight Mn time) we were able to talk with Ben AND he clicked on his webcam so I actually saw my "baby". I burst into tears. Here I thought I was doing so well (and i told you all I was doing so well too) and there I am just a mess of wetness and snot. Fortunately (inshallah) he is doing well --except for the bats in his apartment. Don't ask.

The moderness of the world makes this stint not too bad. We've been able to talk to people on skype-computer communication tool--for free for those who have it loaded on their computers and for $.02 per minute for those who do not. Last night, we were trying to call anyone (it was noon in MN) because we had some time. It was frustrating when no one would answer,but who am I to think people should just be waiting by the telephone?! Life does and will and should go on.

I am thinking and praying for this couple in Pelican Rapids, Bob and Kathy Hanson. Two years ago today they lost their son not too far from where I am, in Iraq. This weekend in Pelican Rapids, a shelter is being dedicated in Josh's honor at Maplewood State Park, where Bob works as Park Ranger. Two years ago I stood, with my children,along the streets of Pelican Rapids at 11 pm, surrounded by a 1000 of my colleagues, neighbors, friends and fellow PR people, silently watching, praying and crying when they brought his body home. I played at the funeral (and sang with the Catholic singers) when his service filled our school auditorium. The Governor attended. The Patriot Guards lined the streets. Thankfully, no protestors were there. I sat with my son, dressed and proud in his Dress Blues (Air Force) Uniform at the Memorial Day service where Kathy became a Gold Star Mother (designation for women whose children were killed in wars)--a club no one wishes to belong to.

Ben is only miles away, I can communicate with him. I should be happy and thankful. I can't hug him but I will soon. I've got to remember that and keep it all in perspective.

We never, ever, ever should take anything or anyone for granted, but we do (guess that's why we're human). Although I don't know Bob and Kathy very well, and didn't really know Josh, I still cry for them. And the other parents who have lost children. Be appreciative and even when they bug us (as Anna just did with her phone call demanding to know why I hadn't done something for her)...just love them.

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